The Pubic Wars Report from Snidelius Whiplashius

The campaign to win a woman can be difficult and arduous. I am not one who quakes at adversity and my little centurion has stood tall through even the darkest passages.

 The way to a woman's heart is through her vagina, or through her mouth and if the path be shorter, the way is more choked with difficulty. 

 What of her most vulnerable point, her ass? Many times my stout lad has resorted to surprise attack only to be turned aside and near broken by the ferocity of her defense.

Barbaric, you say... all's fair in love and war, says I.

In war you'll never win an opponents respect with weakness. You need to terrify them, make them understand that you will stop at nothing, no trick is too vile and low, and there is no limit to the torments you will inflict.

In love, the same, drool with lust or soar to the heavens with poetry.
Pic from swisssublover